The Day My Hair All Fell Out

I can’t recall what day it was when it happened. The chemo zapped me pretty hard, and I don’t really remember relevant dates. I think of my post chemo days in terms of good or bad things that happened on that particular day, like I can remember when Sloan and Dennis and Jen and Bun and Andi and John and Molly and DeVan popped by for visits. Similarly, I remember the incidents that occurred on bad days as well. Losing what was left of my hair was a bad day as I was also doing projectile vomiting every now and again.

I can’t say that I was chagrined or all that bummed out when my hair all fell out. I knew what was coming. I had Michael Sponsel at Freedom Barber Co. on the Beltline to buzz me down a few days before I checked in. I had a few days of walking around with a shiny pink dome in preparation.

One of those mornings post-chemo however I was horrified when I looked in the mirror and my moustache and beard were half missing. I could rub my chin and I’d end up with a bunch of hair in my hands. I went ahead and took off all my facial hair with a razor.

Hair loss due to chemotherapy can be pretty debilitating. For lots of people, a good head of hair is part of who they are. We spend tons of money on the right cut, the right color, highlights and lowlights and God knows what else. I get it-having a good head of hair tells the world you’re confident and robust and healthy. When I had Michael buzz me down I think I was mentally gearing myself up for the trauma I thought losing all my hair might cause. I have a decent looking head, and I usually wear baseball caps anyway. So I was sort of at peace with the idea. That being said, the facial hair loss was a kick in the teeth.

I look old.

Truthfully, I was more afraid of the mouth sores and the GI distress.

The mouth sores didn’t happen. Yet. I may or may not encounter them in the next couple of months but I think I might have dodged a bullet. Gastroenterologistically (did I just create a new word?) it’s been rough, but every day I feel a little bit better. I’m incredibly lucky.